With Ramadan round the corner, we want to focus on Festive Joy and sharing with the community. 

Yasmine Hammad, Author and Founder of  the Blossoming Kindness Initiative shares her expertise on the subject of Kindness and how we can raise KIND children. 

Kindness comes in different shapes and forms. There are numerous ways we can show kindness and give back to our community. Kindness starts with being gentle and kind with oneself. Evidently, having to practise speaking kindly to yourself and your body, will automatically reflect on how you treat and speak to others. The extra mile of kindness is towards spreading that kindness to the world around it – including animals and Mother Earth.

Our body responds positively when an act of kindness has been given, received or even witnessed. The brain sends a neurotransmitter chemical to the body called Oxytocin (known as the love hormone). The oxytocin is mainly produced during hugging, physical contact and childbirth. According to Medical News Today, Oxytocin “has physical and psychological effects, including influencing social behaviour and emotion”. Apart from the cosy feeling of love, oxytocin increases our self-esteem and optimism. It is also responsible for feeling an increased sense of connectedness, belonging and sense of trust. Kindness also stimulates the production of serotonin (a feel good hormone) which heals wounds, calms and increases happiness. Hence improves mood, depression and anxiety.

Did we also mention that kindness releases endorphins in the brain, which is a natural painkiller? Well not only that, endorphins also reduce stress and lift up the mood. Now that you are more familiar with the science behind kindness, please go out in the world and create a big wave of kindness. Remembering that you will not only make it a kinder environment, but you are also nourishing your own body, heart and mind.

0-2 Years

Every child is born inherently kind and his/her life experiences shape them accordingly. Starting from an early age, the act of giving back to the community will enhance your child’s empathy and belonging. At this young age, we recommend you try the following ideas to cultivate kindness:

Kindness to Oneself:

Role playing can be effective when you talk about yourself and others kindly in front of your child. Try saying things like: I am beautiful in front of the mirror. Or when getting dressed say something like: “I love my body as it is”. That will teach the child “self-love and acceptance”, which is part of teaching them to speak kindly to themselves.

Kindness to Others:

• We highly recommend baking some cupcakes with your child and gifting it to the neighbours. This will help the child understand the meaning of community and sharing without having any occasion.
•  When your child is with you, encourage her/him to wave hello and smile to the guards, cleaners and people who work in your area/nursery. This type of encouragement has to be role played, so the child can follow your league. It will help in acknowledging people who make our lives a little easier and safe.

Kindness to Nature and Animals:

• Allow your child to sit outdoors on grass barefoot – to be connected to Mother Earth – and to develop love for nature. This activity will also help the child play more outdoors and be active when he/she is a few years old (kindness to oneself).
• Arrange a beach day for the family in the early morning. Prepare gloves (or sticks) and reusable bin bags. Explain to your child that before you go for a swim, you will be cleaning your part of the beach. Get ready to answer some difficult questions that might arise; for example, “why are people littering?”. You can always answer that not everyone is mindful with their actions and I would love it if you and I can help change their mindsets by showing them. Explain that this is an act of kindness – giving back to your community – help keep the beach clean.

We highly recommend the above acts of kindness to be a safe-space to start a conversation with your child using examples:

• What do you think we did kindly today? We spoke kindly to our bodies…etc
• How did that feel in your body? Did it give you a warm cosy (teddy bear hug) when we gave the cupcakes to our neighbour?
• Isn’t Mother Earth so beautiful? Did the grass make you feel funny?

3-5 Years 

Every child is born inherently kind and his/her life experiences shape them accordingly. Starting from an early age, the act of giving back to the community will enhance your child’s empathy and belonging. At the age between 3 to 5 years old, we recommend you try the following ideas to cultivate kindness:

Kindness to Oneself:

• Role playing can be effective when you talk about yourself and others kindly in front of your child. Start by pointing out your own strength and things you love about yourself. And ask your child if he/she can do the same. Don’t forget to praise them for their efforts and highlight more positive traits about them. That will teach the child “self-love and acceptance”, which is part of teaching them to speak kindly to themselves. It will also help them with thinking kindly of others (empathy).

Kindness to Others:

• One good way to give back, is by decluttering the toy cabinet and gently asking your child if he would like to donate some of those toys to less fortunate children. It is a difficult talk for some but can be led by example. You can clean out one of your drawers and show your child that you are donating some of your clothes to help someone in need and maybe he/she should do the same. Try with one toy first – in a great condition – please avoid broken toys or his favourites. Ask him/her to spend the whole day playing with it and setting the intention to let it go. Explain how it will make another child’s day so much brighter. Clean the toys, write a note to the child, pack it nicely and drop it to a charity together. That will make the experience of giving back a lot more meaningful and positively impactful on your child.

Kindness to Nature and Animals:

•  Take your child to an animal sanctuary or shelter and pet the animals together. That will show him/her to be kind to animals no matter their breed or size. Explain that those animals don’t have a home and that’s why you are going to share some love with them. That will instantly cultivate compassion in a child.
• Arrange a beach day for the family in the early morning. Prepare gloves (or sticks) and reusable bin bags. Explain to your child that before you go for a swim, you will be cleaning your part of the beach. Get ready to answer some difficult questions that might arise; for example, “why are people littering?”. You can always answer that not everyone is mindful with their actions and I would love it if you and I can help change their mindsets by showing them and spreading the word. Explain that this is an act of kindness – giving back to your community – by helping keep the beach clean.

We highly recommend the above acts of kindness to be a safe-space to start a conversation with your child using examples:

• What do you think we did kindly today? We spoke kindly to our bodies…etc
•  How did that feel in your body? Did it give you a warm hugging-feeling when we donated your toys?
• How does playing outdoors make you feel? Did you know that playing outdoors makes you happier and healthier?

6-9 Years 

Every child is born inherently kind and his/her life experiences shape them accordingly. Starting from an early age, the act of giving back to the community will enhance your child’s empathy and belonging. At the age of 6-9 years old, we recommend you try the following ideas to cultivate kindness::

Kindness to Oneself:

• Explaining to the child that kindness to ourselves is very important if we want to lead a healthy life. If they negatively label themselves, please take the time to remove the label and reassure them that they are loved, worthy and safe. A small practice you can do with your child is to print child friendly affirmation cards and let them hang one in their room for one week. Every day, they should put their hand on their heart, breathe in and out and repeat the affirmation to themselves. That will teach the child “self-love and acceptance”, which is part of teaching them to speak kindly to themselves. It will also help them with thinking kindly of others (empathy).

Kindness to Others:

• One good way to give back, is by decluttering the toy cabinet and gently asking your child if he would like to donate some of those toys to less fortunate children. It is a difficult talk for some but can be led by example.  Try with one toy first – in a great condition – please avoid broken toys or his favorites. Ask him/her to spend the whole day playing with it and setting the intention to let it go. Explain how it will make another child’s day so much brighter. Clean the toys, write a note to the child, pack it nicely and drop it to a charity together. That will make the experience of giving back a lot more meaningful and positively impactful on your child.

Kindness to Nature and Animals:

•  Take your child to an animal sanctuary or shelter and pet the animals together. That will show him/her to be kind to animals no matter their breed or size. Explain that those animals don’t have a home and that’s why you are going to share some love with them. That will instantly cultivate compassion in a child.
• Arrange a beach day for the family on an early morning. Prepare gloves (or sticks) and reusable bin bags. Explain to your child that before you go for a swim, you will be cleaning your part of the beach. Get ready to answer some difficult questions that might arise; for example, “why are people littering?”. You can always answer that not everyone is mindful with their actions and I would love it if you and I can help change their mindset and spread the word. Explain that this is an act of kindness – giving back to your community – by helping keep the beach clean.

We highly recommend the above acts of kindness to be a safe-space to start a conversation with your child using examples:

• What do you think we did kindly today? We spoke kindly to our bodies…etc
•  Did it give you a warm hugging-feeling when we donated your toys?
• How does playing outdoors make you feel? Did you know that playing outdoors makes you happier and healthier?